Accidental Hiatus

Hi guys, I'm back from my accidental hiatus. I've been a little dry on things to write about, which is why I haven't in a while. I know most of my readership comes from college students (and my mom), so I don't feel that bad - I know crunch time is upon you. Anyway, I will (for once) update a little about interesting things that I have seen or done lately.

1. I saw John Legend live. I took some pictures, but of course they aren't that great, so if you are curious as to what he looks like, you can Google image search John Legend. In fact, here is the link: hot right? He also sings really well. If you want to hear his music, go onto YouTube and search John Legend. I can't provide that link though, since unfortunately the wonder that is YouTube is blocked by the censors of China. The concert was pretty great, but the best part was probably when a bunch of girls behind me yelled, "WE LOVE YOU JOHN!", and I, not wanted to be bested, yelled louder, "I LOVE YOU MORE JOHN!" and proceeded to pretend to jump off the balcony to run to the stage. I didn't actually do it of course, but you know, all good fun.

2. I went to 杭州 (HangZhou), which is apparently one of China's most beautiful cities. I would have to agree - it really is beautiful, cleaner than any place in China I've been, and has a pretty legit (man-made) lake, 西湖. While I was there, I biked all the way around, and also saw the Zhang Yimo production 印象西湖. I didn't think it was very good, but you guys can give it a shot if you go.

3. I saw Waiting for Godot, a play by Samuel Beckett. I've read it like six times and I think I've seen it once or twice (or maybe not, my memories play tricks on me). I didn't like the production too much, but it might be because a. it got a little warm in there, b. the actor's didn't mesh that well, c. I think the themes are kind of depressing, d. some of the parts are kind of pretentious, or e. the set is so sparce it makes me think I wasted hella money on the ticket. Maybe I'm a Philistine, but I just don't seem to jive with this play.

Anyway, those are three semi-interesting things I have done recently. Not that interesting, but I'll try to update with more interesting thoughts soon. Please comment and let me know how you are doing!

黑人牙膏

So first, I wanted to say how honored I am that Jen Chiu reads my blog. So very honored.

Anyway, it's been eleven days since I've updated my blog, but I had several things I wanted to mention. First, church here is so interesting! Without being particularly negative, I was very astonished at something I saw on Palm Sunday here. I was sitting with a couple friends maybe in the fifth or so pew. Two pews ahead, and almost directly in front of me, there was what seemed to be an Asian married couple who were seriously just making out during worship. Just like all over each others' faces. Honestly? It's just so weird to see two people straight up mouth on mouth action in a pew at church with a possible 600 people glancing at you. Oh, and the guy had a man-purse. I feel like that makes the scene just that much more ridiculous. I can see holding hands, or even hugging, but making out? Too much. I couldn't stop myself from bursting out into uproarious laughter. I think my friends were more ashamed by my laughing than by the couple. The cherry on top is that right after worship ended, the couple grabbed all their stuff and either left or got seats in the back. I like to pretend the first because it makes the story that much better. As a sidenote, I think it's interesting that the worship director plays the keyboards/drum machine every week. That's right. He plays the drum machine.

Tangentially, I think one of my favorite introduce yourself+random question random questions is what toothpaste you prefer to use. Prefer, because sometimes you just can't get it. For some reason, I've always been a Colgate Total person. The idea of 12 hours of protection, even if it's just a marketing gimmick, is somehow really reassuring for me. Also, I think it tastes pretty good. Anyway, I've been to a couple more people's places around here, and in using their bathrooms, have noticed a semi-disturbing trend. Apparently, Darlie Toothpaste is very popular here. In Chinese, Darlie Toothpaste is called 黑人牙膏, which for my non-Chinese reading audience means Black People Toothpaste. I guess I'm more racially sensitive than the average Chinese guy, but that just seems ridiculous. But also ridiculously amusing. The Wikipedia link above is quite enlightening though. Here is a picture of what it looks like:

I just think that's really funny and also very ridiculous.

Warriors Interlude

Okay, I've been good at not writing about the Warriors, but last night I had a revelation. If we traded Monta (bear with me), Wright, and Bellinelli for Chris Bosh this off-season, think about the possibilities. Assuming Crawford doesn't bail (which surprisingly, if this goes through, I hope he doesn't), imagine your starting line. Some point guard (to be addressed later), Crawford, Stack, Bosh, Beans. I mean, that's pretty beastly considering that Crawford and Stack are legit wings who can semi-play point. Okay, next assume you draft a decent point this summer. And, from what I understand, there are a fair amount of possible NBA rotation quality points in the draft. With those other four in the starting lineup, you wouldn't even need a superstar point, just someone who had decent handles and could pass.

Then consider the bench. With Bellinelli and Monta gone, you lose a lot of congestion at the wings, so you have, on the bench, Morrow (shooting fantastically), Buike at the wings, Randolph being Randolph, Ronny running the frontcourt, and Maggette scoring and jacking up fouls. Oh, and CJ Watson running the backup point. I mean it's not the best depth, but you would definitely say it's deep. Okay, now imagine we trade some combination of draft pick/Ronny (God forbid)/Buike (since no one would take Maggette, or would they?) for a second tier starting pg - Raymond Felton/Ramon Sessions for our starting lineup. Final team is something around the lines of 2nd tier pg, Craw, Stack, Bosh, Biens for starting 5, then cj watson/draft pick, morrow, maggette, randolph, ronny, and some random combo of rob kurz/jermareo davidson. That's a good team. I mean, we could definitely make that work. Seriously!

Okay, and on a non-basketball sidenote, this morning I ate some button mushrooms in an omlette in this western-style cafe/deli. Woo mushrooms!

Elevator Efficiency

So in an attempt to write more interestingly on my blog, I've made a little note on the side of my desktop about things to write about.

So mushrooms. If you guys know me or have eaten with me a couple times, you know I really like eating mushrooms. For some reason, though, the normal mushrooms I eat in the US I've never actually had in China. Apparently they are called button mushrooms Here is a picture:

In China, and I'm definitely not complaining about this, all the mushrooms I eat are 香菇. I wonder what that is in English. According to Google Translator (which is the third result if you google translator, oddly enough), its translated as Dried Mushroom. I'm sure they are fresh sometimes though. Anyway, I eat a lot of them and they look like this:

Also, I eat a ton of eggs. I think the only thing for sure I'm coming back from China with (besides my person and a suitcase or two) is high cholesterol. Honestly I love eggs so much. I eat a Chinese egg crepe (the eggs aren't particularly Chinese, but I think the style of crepe is) like every night. Eggs are (wonderfully) an all day food here. I really like using parentheses.

Okay, the cover/title story: elevator efficiency. My dormitory has five elevators. Two on each side of the main corridor and one in the back which I think technically is a service elevator, but is actually no different than the other four except perhaps in smell. Each of the pairs of elevators is controlled independently from the other, ie. if you push the up button on one side, it doesn't register for the other, or for the service elevator in the back. The back service elevator and one of the pairs shuts down at midnight. Oh, and for some odd reason, sometimes if you press down at any given floor, both of the elevators on that side might open their doors for you, and not simultaneously.

Okay, that is all just to say that the program that these elevators are run on seem totally and unecessarily inefficient, and it drives me nuts. I have a hobby of betting on a side to see which side will come first, but most people in their haste push down or up on both sides, step in the first elevator to arrive, and let the other side stop there unnecessarily. I know it isn't a big deal, but it bugs me. I feel like someone should come here, link all the elevators up to one program, make it effecient, and then...well finish. Ahh! Okay that was it, I just wanted to share that with the world.